Bed time. It's such a fight sometimes to force myself to go to bed at a reasonable time. Either I want to go to bed way too early or I want to stay up too late. There's little middle ground. Then there's the fight of taking meds....
I am so tired of taking meds. I pop a handful every morning and every night and now I have a pill in the afternoon. Sigh. I guess this is what comes with living with mental illness. Or any illness really. The exhaustion. The pain. The constant feeling of helplessness. It gets old.
And as I write this, I struggle to find the positive. Where is God in all my chaos? Why did this happen to me? How will I live? What will I do?
I don't have the answers. I won't even try to answer the questions, but I have learned this:
God doesn't always answer in the storm when it is loud and raging. He often answers in the stillness before the storm. The breath of wind right before the clouds burst.
I don't have the answers. I won't even try to answer the questions, but I have learned this: God doesn't always answer in the storm when it is loud and raging. He often answers in the stillness before the storm. The breath of wind right before the clouds burst.
But I'm so focused on the coming storm that I don't hear His voice. It's easy to miss. He wants me to draw close to Him, to lean in and hear Him say, "it's going to be ok."
GOD HELP ME TO LISTEN TO YOUR STILL SMALL VOICE BEFORE THE STORM.
No comments:
Post a Comment
Please remember to not use any profane language, sexual innuendos, or and other forms of derogatory communication. Thank you.